Something Lost
by takemetoeden
Summary: Takes place during season 3, episode 11, "Utopia." Another take on what happened when the Master resurfaced.


The Doctor was thinking out loud about all the preparations that needed to be made in order for the rocket to be ready to fly to Utopia. His mind was going a million miles a minute, he was on a role, when something interrupted his flow.

"Doctor?" It was Martha. He whipped around and saw her sitting with Professor Yana. She was holding something in her hand that was attached to his vest. Her face was full of panic and excitement, and Yana's was full of confusion and uncomprehending. The Doctor walked over to see what she was holding. "Um, Doctor, Professor Yana had this fob watch, and he says he was found with it. He told me..." She glanced at Yana. "He has trouble seeing it, and never really noticed it before, and... Well..." She handed it to the Doctor. His fingers found the metal, and his other hand delved into his jacket to retrieve his glasses, which he put on as quickly as possible. Could it be...?

The design on the back of the copper fob watch could not be mistaken. He looked into the pleading, confused eyes of the Professor with a look of awe on his face.

"No..."

"Doctor, is it...?"

"But it can't be, I would have sensed..." His brow furrowed. "Who are you?" He asked under his breath.

"Well, is it important?" Interrupted Yana. "I mean, please Doctor, this is hardly the time for-"

"Yes, it's important, it's very important. Why haven't you tried to open it before?"

"Because it's broken. There's no point."

"How do you know it's broken?" The Professor looked at the fob watch still in the Doctor's hand curiously. He gingerly took it and examined it. The Doctor slowly took a few steps back, beckoning for Martha to join him. The Professor stroked the design with his thumb and muttered something about it being "just a watch" under his breath, but then... He pressed the button.

The watch immediately sprang open, and the result brought tears to the Doctor's eyes. He immediately sensed the other Time Lord, recognized him... The gold, airborne, compact information streamed from the watch into the Professor's blank eyes, and Martha lifted a hand in front of her eyes to block most of the brilliance. It was so bright that it caught Jack's and Chan Tho's attention, and they curiously approached the spectacle.

"Doctor, what's going on?" Asked Jack.

"He's..." The Doctor started. Just then, the watch snapped itself closed, and the light faded. The Professor blinked a few times. The Doctor's breathing was labored with anticipation.

They all watched as the Professor turned the hand holding the fob watch over, looking at the back.

"Oh, my god, I'm old!" Said the Professor. The Doctor laughed a little hysterically.

"Chan, Professor Yana, tho?" Said Chan Tho. The Professor looked up, disappointment still on his face from realizing his age. As soon as his eyes found the Doctor, that disappointment changed to awe.

"Doctor?" The Doctor smiled.

"It's me."

"Doctor, who is he?" Martha whispered into the Doctor's ear.

"He's Koschei." The Doctor said in awe.

"You know, I think you just really despise the name I chose for myself. I don't go around calling you Theta, now do I?"

"What?" Jack and Martha asked simultaneously.

"Chan, Professor, are you feeling alright, tho?" Asked Chan Tho. She went unnoticed.

"Well, you haven't really spoken of me much, have you?" The Doctor put his glasses away and shoved his hands into his pockets, smiling gleefully.

"True, but I would still prefer you call me by my name. I do _love_ it when you say my name." A slight flush stole over the Doctor's face, but only Jack noticed. He was the only one looking for the signs, as trained as he was.

"Doctor, is he... _Was _he...?" The Doctor's smile faded, and he glanced nervously at Jack.

"Oh, shut up." Jack smiled a true Jack Harkness smile.

"Care to enlighten us on what's going on?" Asked Martha. Suddenly, a warning alarm rang through the laboratory. Everyone sprang into action, connecting wires and pressing buttons and entering codes and yelling instructions to each other until the rocket successfully shot into the eternally night sky. The Doctor ran to the only window and gazed up at the rocket with a smile and triumph written all over his face.

"We did it." Said a voice behind him. The Doctor turned, smiling, to face Professor Yana.

"We did."

"Now, if you don't mind... You know I can't stay old for very long. Horrible wrinkles." The Doctor chuckled and gestured widely, welcoming him to shed his age. The Professor smiled and turned. He opted for stepping out of the room to regenerate, in which time Jack and Martha and Chan Tho all approached the Doctor with questions.

"Who is he!" Martha hissed. The Doctor's smile was replaced with something a little bit more exasperated.

"He's a Time Lord, I went to the Academy with him."

"You two go way back?" Asked Jack suggestively.

"You, shut up." The Doctor pointed a finger at him, and suddenly Martha caught on.

"Wait, were you and he...?" The Doctor sighed and addressed Jack.

"You did this." Jack chuckled as the Doctor walked around them to go do something clever with the controls.

"Oh my God..." Said Martha, astonished.

"You can say that again."

A desperately bewildered Chan Tho approached the Doctor.

"Chan, Doctor, what's happened to the Professor, tho?" She sounded on the edge of tears.

The Doctor turned, not looking forward to explaining.

"Um, Chan Tho, the Professor isn't... Who he was... Anymore."

"Ch-chan what do you m-mean, tho?" Martha had heard her mounting hysteria and came over to comfort Chan Tho.

"She was in love with the Professor." Said Martha softly. Chan Tho turned to look at her, tears streaming down her face. The Doctor's face was filled with sadness.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He whispered. That was when Chan Tho broke down. Martha took her in her arms. It was then that Koschei walked back in.

The Doctor's face brightened as he ran over to the young Koschei. His momentum (or the dashing smile on Koschei's face) threw the Doctor into his arms. They both laughed and held each other as they fought to stay upright. The force of the Doctor's embrace nearly knocked them both over. Neither of them noticed, but the amused look on Jack's face fell a little in that moment.

When the embrace ended, the Doctor was no longer the Doctor. He was Theta all over again. Theta with his Koschei. They were still laughing a little as they faced each other, but the laughter faded when they realized how close they were and that they were still in each others' arms. Memories flitted through both of their heads and the undertones changed completely.

"I missed you." Said Koschei. Theta nodded.

"I missed you too." They both smiled fondly at each other.

"Not exactly the best time, you two." Jack's voice popped their bubble from the TARDIS door and they both looked at him just in time to see him wink and disappear into the TARDIS.

Koschei and Theta simultaneously put space between them, and they both laughed nervously.

A few hours later, Theta, Koschei, Martha, and Jack were in the TARDIS. They had just dropped off Chan Tho on a very open-minded, friendly planet and were now sitting around the console, trying to break the awkward silence. Martha cleared her throat.

"So..." Everyone turned to look at her. She flushed and looked pleadingly at Jack. He rolled his eyes.

"So you two...?" Started Jack. Theta and Koschei glanced at each other, and then back at Jack.

"Second year." Said Koschei. Theta smiled and ducked his head. Koschei looked at him fondly. "He was a twat at first, but he came around."

"Oh, _I_ was a twat?" They both laughed. Jack smiled.

"So, does he know...?" Jack addressed the Doctor, whose face fell as he realized what Jack meant. _So does he know you two are the only ones left? _

"No..."

"Do I know what?" He looked at the Doctor, who looked back at him, an apology clearly written in his eyes. He tried for words for a few minutes before giving up and standing.

"Right. Martha, I think you should go tell your family that you're alive. Jack, you can... Meet the parents or something..." The Doctor went to the door of the TARDIS and opened it. Jack and Martha gave each other a knowing glance before standing at walked a little too quickly off of the TARDIS. However, Jack paused right outside the door and said,

"Doctor, what is the name that he chose?" The Doctor smiled and looked back at the Time Lord affectionately stroking the console of the TARDIS.

"Master." Jack stifled a suggestive giggle and turned to follow Martha.

It was Theta who closed the door and walked back up to Koschei. He was walking around the console, studying all the nobs and buttons fondly.

"So I guess you finally did graduate, eh? Didn't think you could do it without me." Koschei laughed once. Theta knew what he meant. You had to graduate from the Gallifreyan Academy before you could get a travel license, and then you had to earn your TARDIS. Koshei had been taken away before he could graduate. It was a subject they didn't often bring up.

"Nope. I stole it." Koschei looked up at Theta with bright, surprised eyes.

"Did you really? Sounds like you. Remember that time we graffitied the wall of the Great West Wing of the Science building?" They both chuckled a little at the memory.

"Fifth year. Rassilon plus Omega forever. We got in so much trouble." They laughed again. As soon as the last chuckle died, the undertones were back, stronger than before. Koschei stared across at Theta, and Theta stared back. The silence stretched until the tension was almost visible. Then, with a resolute set of jaw, Koschei took three determined steps around the console and grabbed either side of Theta's face, and pressed their lips together.

New teeth, new lips, new tongues, new taste, same people. They couldn't get enough of each other. Theta grabbed Koschei by the front of his clothes and pressed their bodies even closer together. Their breath intermingled, hot and warm and desperate.

When their feverish kissing finally died down, Koschei pulled away and, still breathing heavily, asked,

"What is it that I don't know?" A small frown formed between Theta's eyebrows and he stepped away and turned so he didn't have to face that desperate, flushed face.

"You were asleep for a really long time... Kept dormant in the heart of Gallifrey as..." Theta swallowed.

"As what?" Koschei asked innocently. Theta sighed.

"As it burned." Koschei made a gagging noise.

"What? Gallifrey... Burned?" Theta turned. "Why? How? Where are all the others?" Koschei was quickly becoming hysterical. His lower lip trembled and his eyes filled as the gravity of the situation fell on him. He stepped forward and seized Theta's shoulders fiercely. "Where are all the others!"

"They're dead." Theta whispered. "All of them. They all died." Koschei stared into Theta's eyes for a moment. Then his arms fell, and he took a staggering step backwards. He almost fell, but Theta caught him just as his knees gave. They both collapsed to the floor, and 900 years of grief built up behind Theta's eyes and they both cried. "I'm so sorry, there was nothing I could do, all of them just perished and I... I led them all into war, into the Time War, and we at least took them with us. Koschei, I'm so sorry-"

"W-who were they?" Koschei sobbed. Theta took a shuddering breath in.

"Daleks." Koschei's sobs turned into pure hyperventilation, and Theta could tell he was about to blow.

"Koschei, don't-" He threw off Theta's arms and stood, furious and hysterical and incoherent, and he turned on the spot, shouting and yelling in Old Gallifreyan words that would have made Gallifreyan professors blush.

"Damn those Daleks, those bastards! I wish I could have fought against them, fought for my people-" More swearing in Gallifreyan. "-and they can stick their stupid little plungers right up their-" More Gallifreyan.

Theta looked down at his lap and chuckled a little, despite himself. How he had missed Koschei's temper tantrums. He stood lethargically and sat on the captain's chair, watching as Koschei worked off his anger. It was a quick and burned brightly before it fizzled out. It was not the fury of a Time Lord, which was cold and painful. Koschei's anger was of outrage and panic. He had no memories to feed his loathing. Theta's fury was that of a Time Lord. It burned inside of him and had for 900 years. He had no more fight in him when it wasn't directed. He couldn't cry just for the sake of it. Only for Koschei's sake.

Eventually, Koschei calmed down and slumped onto the captain's chair beside Theta, resting his head on his shoulder and breathing heavily, a sob still in his voice.

"My mum and dad... All my brothers..." Theta kissed the top of Koschei's head and held him close to him. They stayed like that for some time.

* * *

"We fought long and hard and we thought we had won the day, but we soon realized our culture was falling apart. I watched the last Dalek ship crash into the jaws of the Nightmare Child." Theta twirled a few of Koschei's hairs in his fingertips lazily. "And then the fires took them."

"But you escaped?" Koschei didn't lift his head from Theta's chest.

"I did. I... Time Locked the entire war." Koschei nodded. "The Time Lords were just becoming too greedy and lustful for power. They would have made terrible gods."

"No, I know, I... I'm glad you did it." Theta smiled slightly. It was good to hear. He always wondered.

"I'm just glad you're alright. I've spent 900 years thinking you had perished in the heart of Gallifrey." Theta shifted his feet at the end of the bed and resumed running his fingers through Koschei's dirty blond hair.

"Theta..." Koschei looked up at him. "Doctor..." Theta looked back into Koschei's eyes as Koschei whispered, "You never did say my name." A playful smile tugged at Theta's lips. He pushed himself down towards the foot of the bed so his face was level with Koschei's. Then, he whispered back,

"Master." Koschei smiled and kissed him gently. Theta smiled. "I remember the precise moment you chose that name." Koschei's face warmed as blood pooled beneath his skin. Theta's fond smile turned a little more intense and the memory of a fire burned behind his eyes. "We had been going at it for hours, we had actually made a sweat stain on the bed." They both chuckled quietly. "I brought you all the way to the top and as you breached the breaking point, you..." Theta smiled. "You said my name." There was a pause, totally drained of anything remotely awkward. "And then afterwards as you drifted down off your high, you told me what you wanted to be called."

"It completely turned the tables from then on, as I recall." Koschei laughed. "Remember the fields? The first time." Theta's face lit up.

"Out in the tall, red grass. You were trying to be romantic." Said Theta incredulously.

"Yeah, I was."

"You failed." They both laughed. "Oh, it was the most painful thing I had experienced!" Koschei kept laughing. "And you thought the grass would be soft enough. Never tried that again, did you?" They dissolved into giggles.

"Well, what about you? The one time you decided to be adventurous, you took me onto the ROOF!" Theta laughed at the memory. "I thought I was going to die!" They both laughed for a long while, releasing all the sorrow about Gallifrey and using it as an outlet for their joy at seeing each other again.

"Remember that one time I had been hitting the tulips and I bumped into the Lord High President on our way back to the dorms?" Koschei's face was actually red from laughing so heartily.

"You told him-" Koschei was cut off by his own laughter. "You told him... You wanted to see... What was under his Prydonian robe!" Theta rolled onto his back and laughed loudly, and Koschei pounded his hand on the bed as they both recalled the incident.

"I got... In SO much trouble!"

That was when Jack walked in.

"What got you in so much trouble?" Jack poked his head in and smiled at the laughing pair.

"Jack! Jack, come in here!" Theta sat up, face still red from laughing. Jack obliged, sitting awkwardly in a chair at the side of the bed. "This one time..."

"Ooh, remember the Hand of Omega?" Theta howled with laughter and nodded.

"Okay, Jack, there's this thing called the Hand of Omega... And it's a hand... And... I stole it once, and me and Koschei..." Koschei clapped his hand over Theta's mouth.

"Suffice it to say that we put it to good use." Said Koschei. They both laughed, and Jack joined in, genuinely surprised that his Doctor could be capable of anything badass, or kinky like the images flying through his brain.

"Remember that time I announced at Zoran's that I was Lord High President of the Dance floor?"

"Hah! Yes! You had to be escorted off the premises for blasphemy." They both gasped for breath as their laughter took control of them.

"I think it was the fifth time that Timespan that I had to be taken to Borusa and reprimanded for blasphemy." Koschei merely nodded, incapable of speech at the moment.

"How long exactly is a Timespan, Doctor?" Theta turned his attention back to Jack.

"About... Twelve minutes." Jack's laughter boomed through the TARDIS.


End file.
